Life for the honestyrain household has been foever altered this morning. I am the Esteemed Winner of a British Lottery. All I have to do is tell them a little about myself and poof! the cheque is in the mail!

From: rnelke5251@cox.net
Subject: Esteemed Winner!!!
Date: October 5, 2007 5:06:02 AM CDT (CA)
Reply-To: chasecourier@hotmail.com

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Respected Winner…….

We are pleased to inform you of the final announcement today, 5th
October,2007 for winners of the UK NATIONAL LOTTERY ONLINE PROMO PROGRAMME, held on the 10th of September,2007. You are getting the FINAL NOTIFICATION as regards this.You have been approved to claim a total sum of (£100,983.00) . Congratulations, you have just won yourself £100,983.00 in the satellite software email lottery conducted by UK NATIONAL LOTTERY PROMOTION in which your e-mail address was randomly selected by software powered by the Internet lottery.
Contact our AFFILIATED COURIER COMPANY for your free delivery of your
certificate and cheque of £100,983.00. When contacting them you are
to include this ORDER NUMBER: UK/CCS/401331H as your secret number of your parcell to the courier company.

Full Names:
Address:
Age:
Sex:
Occupation:
Phone numbers:
Country
Nationality:
Here are the contact info of our Register Courier company:
NAME:MR LES RICHESON (Administrative/dispatch officer)
SERVICE EMAIL: chasecourier_ltd@hotmail.com
COMPANY: CHASE COURIERS LIMITED
TEL: +447045706483.

Thank you for being part of our online promotional lottery program.

Yours Truly,
Sir Steven Smith.
Co-ordinator(Online Promo Programme)

Sir Steven Smith, you’re my new best friend. You’re totally welcome for being part of your completely random (Imagine my luck! All the email addresses in the world! Mine is chosen!) email lottery. I kinda wish it was more like eighty frillion British pounds, to be honest. Because if you’re going to host a fake lottery I see no reason to go cheap. I mean, imagine my excitement at eighty frillion, Sir Steven Smith. Imagine the joy.

I won three hundred and fifty dollars at bingo once and they wanted to know my gender too. I had to pull down my pants. It’s a money winning requirement in most countries.

You know, most reputable businesses and lottery companies etcetera have their email addresses through hotmail. Everyone knows that is the first sign of respectability.

(I think I’ll dial that number. I bet it’s a chinese takeaway.)