Every morning I wish I could get some stuff done but I can’t. Madison only goes to school afternoons and if you’ve ever had a five year old you know that they work at breakneck pace to keep you from finishing even the simplest task. Mothers don’t complain that they can’t even go to the bathroom without interruption for no reason. There’s a reason. It’s called: children under 10.

Now you’d think that once I’ve dropped her off at school and can come home to a house free of needy little monsters (cute needy little cute monsters, to be sure) I’d be all about the business of doing them thangs I was so anxious about doing earlier.  

YOU’D THINK and YOU’D BE WRONG.

No, No, dear internet stranger! I am not about the doing once I am alone. I am about the sitting on my ass still thinking about the doing! Ha! And I am smart enough to deduce that it is perhaps not Madison who gets in my way in the mornings. It is perhaps my predisposition to be a LAZY FARTHEAD causing all the problems.

Farthead is funny because you could read it as fart head OR farth ead. And then you would say, what’s a farth ead? I don’t know what that is. honesty*rain is lazy and stupid.

Sadly, you would be on the money there.

I mean well, I really do. But don’t they all? Haven’t you heard it a million times, mostly from teenagers and grown men? I was going to do it, Mom, honest, but [insert random blurbly nonsense excuse here]. God, shouldn’t I be above that? I’m forty. I had a party about it and everything. I should have my act together, or something. But to have my act together I’d have to stop scanning Etsy and I honesty don’t see that happening. People are out there making beautiful things. I cannot pretend not to know! It’s like a car accident on the side of the road – I CANNOT LOOK AWAY! Not even to go make a car accident of my own! Dammit!

check out one of my faves – i made my first etsy purchase at my little sunshine the other day. Rachel is a lovely seller with a beautiful shop. Please go have a look.